Sex: one of the few indoor (and sometimes outdoor) activities that Coronavirus hasn’t touched with its clammy hand of disease. While the dating-scape looks a lot different than it used to — i.e. no more crowded bars for meet-cutes — the basics have remained the same. That’s the beauty of sex; it always finds a way to thrive and evolve, no matter the conditions. When it comes to the kinks and fetishes that keep sex interesting, you’ll always have the foundational standards that refuse to go away. Then there are more modern and risque ways of doing it that would make even the most experienced fornicator blush. From exhibitionism to Gerontophilia — sexual arousal towards the elderly, here are enough kinks and fetishes to last you until Coronavirus phase ∞
Ah, age play; a kink as old as the people who get off pretending to be a different age. Whether you’re both pretending to be two centenarians living in the world’s sexiest nursing home or masquerading as two middle-aged stay-at-home single parents whose kids sleep very deeply, age play gives you a chance to explore your elderly side.
Another must-try for those looking to depart the Vanilla Station on a one-way ride to Pervertsville, USA. Under the BDSM umbrella, bondage is the act of “consensually tying, binding, or restraining a partner for erotic, aesthetic, or somatosensory stimulation.” Unlike other BDSM-adjacent activities, there’s not always a pain element automatically included with bondage. Getting into it is as easy a Google search or with an experienced partner to show ya the ropes.
It really is a shame that the human meatloaf-shaped dumpsters of the “alt. right” have stolen this term when, in reality, it’s just a harmless fetish. From watching a partner flirt with another man to actively watching your partner drill the babysitter from an inch way, cuckolding is all about relinquishing power. With 4 – 5% of the U.S. identifying as polyamorous, the concept of seeing your loved one with another person isn’t as shocking as it used to be.
“I find dominance really fascinating and liberating for both subs and dommes,” says plus-size model, influencer, and fashion, wellness, and body-positive content creator, Romi Chase. “One gets to take charge/lose control and what better way to do it than through sexual experiences. It’s actually more about ‘power’ rather than a physical sensation. Our sex life overall is based on some sort of ‘power’ exchange anyway and the fact that one partner is more dominant than the other brings equilibrium to sex life and relationship overall. BDSM in general is unlike what people might think very empowering.”
There’s no better feeling than the spark of chemistry you feel when you’re on a really good date… unless you’re into puke. Emetophilia is a puke fetish and there are a couple different ways to make it work.
“You can be sexually aroused by vomiting or seeing others vomit in any form,” says Zachary Zane, sex advice columnist at Men’s Health and brand ambassador to Promescent, a sexual health and wellness brand,” when, specifically, there’s sexual arousal from having someone vomit on your penis (or vomiting on another person’s penis) from deepthroating.”
The honest-to-goodness truth is that some people just like having fists halfway up their torsos. Deal with it, cowards! P.s. use more lube than you think.
Must like fisting, gagging is one of those kinks that require rules, limits, and safe words. When it’s a reaction from deep-throating or courtesy of a literal gag, some say the lack of oxygen to the brain actually heightens the feeling of pleasure for the gag-ee.
Take a minute to picture a hot dog. A weiner and a pair of buns… do you see it? Popular enough to deserve its own active subreddit, lovers of everything ass literally get off on the act of sliding one’s dick between the ass cheeks of a loved (or vaguely liked) one.
Impact Play is an umbrella term referring to the use of whips, hands, paddles, and leather belts during romantic times. Glamour encourages those participating in impact play to always “stick to areas that are fatty, such as the side of the butt or thighs, and avoid anywhere organs reside, such as the kidneys (lower back) or rib cage” while communication with your partner(s) about your limits.
Think of “jack off instruction” or “JOI” as a form of submission in which a partner takes you through masturbation at their own pace; i.e. being told to masturbate. A lot of JOI sessions include some variance of edging (i.e. “purposefully stopping thrusting or rubbing in order to prevent climax”) and dominance.
Remember that iconic scene from American Psycho is in bed with those two sex workers (RIP) and he can’t take his off of himself in the mirror? Enter Katoptronophilia — the act of having sex/getting aroused to one’s reflection. Fun fact: the Greek word for mirror is “katoptron.”
Not only should we be normalizing breastfeeding in public, but why not celebrate the more private side of the miracle of life with lactation?! This fetish shines a spotlight on the breasts and the gift of milk they produce after the birth of a child. I think you can imagine how easy it is to incorporate nipple-sucking into a fetish involving breastmilk.
The yin to sadism’s yang, masochism is sexual gratification from physical pain or humiliation. While it goes hand-in-hand with sadism, this act specifically focuses on seeking pain from another person. Sadism is the opposite.
Here’s a fun little kink in which someone gets sexual pleasure from — get this — licking eyeballs.
As we, as a society, move away from lumping pregnant women into a category alongside the elderly and feebleminded, kinks and fetishes emerge celebrating the woman’s form and everything it’s capable of. For those into lactation play or the kind of sex that results in the birth of a baby… as opposed to conception.
Queerplatonic Relationship (QPR)
As the love spectrum evolves, the very definition of sex and love itself shifts. QPR is not about sex — at least, not always — but instead focuses on the intense emotional feelings of friendship in a relationship. According to Kinkly, the term was coined by “the members of the aromantic and asexual communities to describe the intense non-romantic and non-sexual relationships they had.”
Like age play, roleplaying is for those who get off on their own imagination. We’ve all seen the teacher and student fantasy play out in pop culture, while incense porn consistently rises in popularity year after year. Like many other kinks and fetishes on this list, role-playing involves both consent and communication for a successful romp with your step-aunt.
To get into sploshing, you need to know a little about hunger.
“Sploshing, at its most basic level, refers to the act of incorporating copious amounts of food into your sex life,” adds Zane. “This can take many forms. It can be a subset of WAM, if you’re getting aroused by covering yourself or seeing your partner covered in, say, chocolate sauce. There can also be an element of feederism where you gain sexual gratification feeding your partner and watching them gain weight (the feeder). Or conversely, are sexually gratified by being fed and gaining weight (the feedee or gainer).”
Also known fondly as “golden showers,” urophilia involves bringing urine into your sex life.
“There is nothing in psychological literature which suggests people who are into golden showers have any deficiencies,” said Dr. Mark Griffiths in an interview with MirrorOnline. Dr. Griffiths goes on to describe, in detail, what makes piss-addicts tick.
“Some urophiliacs may also bathe in urine, enjoy smelling people in urine-soaked clothes, and/or engage in urophagia (i.e., drinking the urine). For urophiliacs, the drinking of the urine typically takes place while someone else urinates directly into their mouth.”
Whether you’re into watching your partner masturbate or into the kind of sex with a participating audience, voyeurism is all about watching others get off.
Wet and Messy (WAM)
“Like Marie Kondo,” continues Zane, “those with a Wet and Messy Fetish love mess. They’re aroused by messy non-bodily substances like shaving cream, slime, paint, and lotion. Some folks like the tactile feeling of these substances, which are often sticky. Others like the feeling of being doused or submerged. For some, arousal comes just from feeling ‘dirty’ both literally and metaphorically.”
What better way to challenge and widen the walls of your sex life than by watching seasoned professionals go out it in a closed set. Let us raise a glass to porn, a means of broadening your horizon from the safety of your home.
By now, if you aren’t familiar with furries, you’re doing it wrong. Furry fandom is a “subculture interested in anthropomorphic animal characters with human personalities and characteristics.” While there is a lot to be learned about this massive scene, the most important term you need to know is yiffing — i.e. sex named “after the sound foxes make during sex.”
Hailing from the land of the rising sun, Japan, zentai involves the donning of a skin-tight spandex or lycra suit.