No matter how much you screen your online suitors, there’s no way around it: sometimes, you’re going to be on one of those terrible, horrible, no good, very bad dates. You know the scene: the chick doesn’t look anything like her photos. Or, she is giving more attention to her precious iPhone than you. Maybe, she won’t stop going on-and-on about her recent break-up. Ugh.
Whatever the reason why you’re not diggin’ the girl, even one happy hour cocktail seems too long. That’s when you probably wish you had a ‘sick uncle’ to rescue you from your torture.
Now, you sort of can.
A cloud developer advocate at Microsoft developed an app that can fake a phone call to rescue you from any awkward situation. Whether that’s the first date scenario, a bar scene where someone is relentlessly hitting on you or even a networking conference, it’s a bit of code that can go a long way. By pushing a remote bluetooth button, her phone will ring and as she answers, a script is read out loud. Though her ‘caller’ is a fake boyfriend, it’s a customizable experience, allowing you to create whoever you’d like.
While you probably want to download this cool creation, you may have to wait, since development is still in its infancy. Right now, she’s working on making the now-robotic voice sound more human-like, so those emergencies seem more believable. If you are tech-savvy though, you can program it on your phone right now using the code she’s shared. You can change everything from who is calling you to what song plays when it rings, since hey, you need to know when your fake boyfriend, girlfriend, mom, aunt or best friend is ringing you.
After figuring out the kinks and investing in the technology, she does plan to make it more accessible to a wider audience since hey, everyone has been in a situation they need to escape from. In the meantime though, here are some strategies you can execute if you want to get away from your bad, bad date ASAP:
“I’m so sorry but I’m not feeling great.”
And leave it at that. Trust us, her imagination will run wild all the way to the toilet and she’ll be glad you left before having an, um, accident.
“You seem wonderful but I actually just met someone.”
Yes, it’s a little white lie. But it doesn’t sting as much as ‘Wow, you’re awful.’
“Thank you for the date — but I don’t see a connection here.”
If you’re brave enough, she’ll probably respect you the most from saying it how it is. After all, no one wants to linger on the chance of a future if there isn’t one.